coma

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soooo i feel like i should write something, but im not entirely sure what.

i had a manic spell. well, am having, maybe. my shrink gave me these like horse tranqs of sleep meds that i’ve been taking since thursday. they make me sleep about 20 hours per pill and i have to take a pill a day. so, basically what i am saying is they are the very definition of wasting your life.

i tried not taking them yesterday but then i was manic this morning (/all night). and brandon made me take more. he also texted jon that i was “calling in crazy” for the day and that he should tell me not to come into work.
which i still find sort of funny.

i wrote that last night. the situation remains relatively unchanged, however. I did manage to get up at 2pm today though, which is a solid 8 hours earlier than usual. got mah eyebrows did. went to the community garden and watered the plot and picked some lettuce and cukes and herbs for a salad tonight and tabouleh if i ever go to the store to get tomatoes. going to trivia with jon tonight. sometimes i just want to curl my entire being into jon in the most platonic way possible. i cant explain it. i think its just the completely lack of filter. he knows everything about me for far too many angles. hes a safe space for my brain. no matter what it spits out or is doing i just dont have to worry about it, and i dont have to be alone.

though he is my boss. which should feel more complicated than it does. then again, we havent had performance review week yet. ha.

amber moved to cape breton this week. has a sad.
i need to get my license. and maybe a car. or a car share. probably a car share.

its sunny. gloriously sunny.

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