im home and i should be out.

its jons last night here and hes spending the night, he says. then he forgot he had beer planned with friends at 9 30 so i was supposed to go to that. and i tried. i walked to the bar but they were charging cover and i didnt have cash and jon didnt answer his phone so i walked home. jon texted he would spot me but im already here and he hasnt responded to any of my texts since, so. im here. i put on my pajamas i go back and forth between sobbing and writing. im not even sure what im sobbing about… that hes leaving in general, that i didnt go to the bar, that this is what my last night with my best friend turned into i dont know. honestly im exhausted and i just want to go to bed but i cant because im not sure when he’ll get here.

i dont know what to do, internet. someone tell me what to do.


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